The Sunscreen Speech

"Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young."

- An excerpt from Everybody's Free (to Wear Sunscreen), by Baz Luhrmann

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What I spent my teenage years knowing as "the sunscreen speech" continues to speak truths to me today. If you've never heard of it and am clueless as to what I am talking about, I encourage you to listen to the speech online, or at least to read the lyrics. The writing is straightforward, and the meaning is inherent for each of us.

I am still getting to know my parents, even though I no longer live in the same house as them. I miss having a free pantry to raid and the bliss of not having to pay bills or sort through paperwork for five hours at a time, as I used to watch my parents do. I miss our family road trips during the summers with our RV, even if I never understood "enjoying the scenery" at age eleven. I miss watching movies with "chippies" and salsa, and fish sticks (well, the act of fish sticks - not so much fish sticks themselves), and driving to dance classes, and being able to go home to undeniable, unyielding support. Even now, as I am dirt-poor and occasionally resorting to a can of Pringles for dinner, my parents lend me support or money, like a recent check for me to join AFTRA (so that I can hopefully get more work as a stunt performer and as an actor).

This weekend, I received an envelope in the mail from my mother. I laughed out loud as I turned the envelope over and saw five giant, absurdly large "V" (for "Vincent") stamps on it. I opened the envelope and found a simple note, accompanied by four separate checks for a decent sum of money. In Mommy handwriting was simply written, "Invest in YOU. Do what it takes! :) :) Put these aside in your lockbox in case you need them, but in the meantime, STOP STRESSING ABOUT $! P.S., I was just kidding about only sending you money to jump off buildings. You can use them for food if you really want to... just don't tell anyone what a softie I am. :)"

Sorry, mommy. I told.

After reading my mom's note, I started crying, tears colliding with the huge smile on my face, because of how lucky I am to have such supportive parents. My parents are not perfect by any stretch of the imagination; like all human beings, they have their shortcomings as people. But they are absolutely committed to giving myself and my siblings every opportunity they can. And for that, I love them so dearly.

A word to my peers: tell your parents you love them, and tell them thank-you, often. Siblings and fine friends are no different. So what if you weren't close while growing up, or if you haven't really spoken to that high school peer in several years. Take a deep breath, reach out, and give yourself permission to be vulnerable enough to grow close to someone, maybe again, or maybe for the first time. You have nothing to lose, and only love to gain.